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All online training videos are in windows media player format. During this video training feel free to stop and discuss with your trainer any comments or questions you may have. Please read RELATIONSHIP BALANCED IN ALL WE DO before viewing videos.
Relationship Video #6 Relationship Video #7 Relationship Video #8 Relationship Video #9 Relationship Video #10 Relationship Video # 11 Relationship Video #12 Relationship Video #13 Relationship Video #14 Relationship Video # 15 Relationship Video #16
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Relationship Training (Please read before reviewing videos.) RELATIONSHIP
BALANCED IN
ALL WE DO How
to make everything in our Philosophy and Guidelines work together to be
the most successful with children. The job of parents always has been difficult and challenging as described by all parents throughout the past. In today’s world, this seems to be even truer. Working with children who have difficulty living in society or have been removed from their parents because of failure is even more challenging. The
contents of the Philosophy and Guidelines book are centered on
relationship, developing and maintaining good relationships with
children. Relationship is
defined as a connection, tie, bond or attachment; caring for, loving,
doing for and close to. Relationship
must be built into the success and pride in what we all do together,
helping children to explore their traumas and issues to find ways to
deal with them in a way that their behaviors do not disrupt or destroy
their lives, looking forward with anticipation to have fun and teaching
kids to be responsible and accountable for their behaviors and
decisions, and working together as a team in all we do with this type
work being our mission and goal in life.
Staff must learn to individualize for each child while helping
children form a group identity. The
spiritual side of our work has the potential always to be
our strongest component as children respond strongly to staff
with heart that provide a family environment with a community spirit. The focus in all we do must be on what’s best for the child and not what’s best or easiest for staff. The ideas above have been developed through experience and training for over 35 years as a way of thinking in a positive manner about using relationship in a combination of things when worked together has proven to be very successful with our most difficult task. 1. It is difficult for staff to keep in mind all the things that must be thought of when working with our children. When something happens, it may be necessary to do one thing for one child and something completely different for the next child. This requires a lot of working together with each other, aware that at any given time anyone doing what we do will need help. This requires that we be hard on the issue of what we do, always striving to keep the best interest of the child foremost but also recognizing that almost always a staff is doing the best they can and need help from their partners and team to do this. ALWAYS TRY TO HELP EACH OTHER! 2. The best approach is very similar to the approach that parents take in a regular home. Parents must try with love and caring to balance everything they do, not leaving anything out. We have to build a relationship with our children in residential care and become what their parents usually have not been. We must care for them deeply, showing them all the while they are afraid we will not hurt them as they have been hurt in the past that they are safe with us. We try to develop this relationship by having fun with them, helping them to be successful at something to build their usually low self esteem and pride in who they are and we are. While doing relationship in all of these things, we continue to focus on the issues and traumas that were the underlying reasons the child was referred to us in the first place. 3. It is often a difficult task to figure out that the disruptive or unacceptable behavior that is exhibited by the child almost always has an underlying connection to the traumas the child experienced. What is seen on the surface must be looked at mainly to figure out what is really going on behind or underlying the behavior with the child. Quite often the child is also unaware what is going on behind the behavior. 4. Our children often show anger, withdrawal or depression in their response to their traumas. We have experienced the greatest success by using a wide variety of individuals as staff with wide age differences, diverse backgrounds, training and skills. Our staff most often as a team tackle different parts to help the child to work through this. Some staff will deal with helping the child learning new ways to express their anger or new ways to feel better about themselves while other staff will help the child delve into where their feelings come from and why they act the way they do. This team approach has the greatest chance for success with our type children with the highest level based on the team’s ability to communicate with each other and understand what the other team members are doing. 5. Most failures in our type environment is when one or the other of all of these things mentioned is done without relationships as the goal and out of balance. Failure can be a results of focusing on the wrong thing such as thinking the child is here primarily because of problems with school or when recreational activities become the center of what we do. If there is too much emphasis on working with the traumas and kids are not accountable for their behaviors, chaos usually results and success is often lost. If behavior is primarily what is dealt with and staff do not focus on developing relationships and helping children to be successful, children usually make only marginal success. Staff can get bogged down in the menial concrete tasks that must also be performed but ignore the more difficult jobs that require intense thinking and involvement. When there is not good communication and working relationships among all staff, success usually is less. It must be recognized that this is a very difficult job and care must be given to the care givers. If praise and celebration for the success of working with the children is not given, experienced people can be lost and the primary reason for success(good staff) with children is lost as well. 6. Balancing all of these things by staff seeking to develop a relationship with the child is the greatest indicator of success. Often it is difficult to see when things are not in relationship and in balance and time can go by before it is recognized and corrected. Any person on the team may be the one recognizing things are out of balance and it is usually a challenge for them to get their team members to see this and get things back in balance. SUMMARY:
Many things must
be in relationship and balanced 1.
Caring staff who love
children and develop attachments and bonding with children 2.
Understand how the abuse,
abandonment and/or past trauma effect behaviors 3.
Hold child accountable for
behaviors 4.
Success and pride, self
esteem building, have fun 5.
Team among staff involved
with the child After complete review of this training material employees will receive 4 hours of training credit for video and discussion. Please contact your supervisor for documentation.
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